Goodbye Girls, Hello Life.

20 Jun

It is June of 2011, nine am in the morning. I am in Doctor Kaufman’s office having my annual gynecological appointment. She is giving me a breast exam and she says these innocent words yet again, “hmmm, there are changes AGAIN in your breasts, we are going to move your scans up.” At first I was perfectly fine.  By the time I left her office, drive five minutes up the road I am hysterical. I am not doing cancer, no way, no how.  My next thought was it’s time for these girls to go. My husband Isaac is in California, it’s a three-hour time difference. It took all day to reach him. By then I had worked myself into a wonderful frenzy. It was not a pretty sight.

Looking back I can definitely say that I went crazy in a short amount of time. I actually felt that I had a good reason to be hysterical; I carry a ton of baggage. Nine women on my mother’s side of the family have had breast or ovarian cancer spanning three generations, including my grandmother, mother, aunt, sister, cousins and great aunts. There were two women on my fathers and two best girlfriends. Thirteen women. Many of them have not survived.  I also carry the BRCA2 gene mutation.

My name is Sharon and I am a pre-vivor of hereditary breast cancer, wife, mother, sister, friend, life coach and your basic miracle maker.

Detaching from my girls was an eight year decision in the making. It started with my sisters breast cancer diagnosis, which propelled me to get genetic testing done. I had stuck my head in the sand for many year avoiding it. These past eight years have been filled with many changes including a remarriage to my wonderful husband,  a loss of a girlfriend, my girls etc. Although very successful,
I was very unfulfilled in my job and seeking to do more with my life. Being laid off was a gift in disguise.  With the support of my husband, I made the decision to study and be a certified professional life coach so that I could attain lifelong dream of helping others. During this time my second best girlfriend was diagnosed with cancer. Since breast cancer has been such a huge part of my life I focused my business within this community.

Fast forward eight years to last June. I announced to the world that I had decided to let the girls go. Why? Announcing it would help me keep my word to myself.  It took all of my skills as a life coach to keep myself sane.  One of the things that I did was look in the mirror every day and say goodbye to them. It was a way of expressing all of the swirling thoughts and emotions that engulfed me. Fortunately for me I had the time to do it.  I also reached out for support to very key people. The wonderful individuals who I knew would support me in my decision to say hello to life that was worry free.

The experience created many miracle moments including the miracle of new-found appreciation, bravery and courage of other women who either have my choice or have limited choices. It brought the miracle and true value of help, peace of mind and balance. It also spurred me to write that book that I was always talking about. Saying good-bye to my girls brought clarity to my mission and purpose to what is possible in my life and to share that with others through my MiracleMindest programs. Lastly I finally and most important, I got busy living.

Sharon Roth-Lichtenfeld is a pre-vivor of hereditary breast cancer, MIRACLE MAKER and founder of Good Grief Coaching.  Many cancer patients, caregivers, pre-vivors and staff come to Sharon to gain tools and techniques to create the MIRACLE OF WHAT IS POSSIBLE so they can get busy living.  Sharon has a knack for helping people feel comfortable in uncomfortable situations. Her life coaching is offered to support organizations, treatment centers and direct to clients. To connect call 856-270-2308, or visit


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